Dodgers brutalize D’backs in 22-1 stomping

LOS ANGELES — Canadian comedian Russell Peters has a line that whenever his immigrant dad would get angry he’d say “Somebody gonna get a hurt real bad.” Well, Saturday the Dodgers got angry, and the Diamondbacks got a hurt real bad. After playing pretty poorly all week, the Dodgers decided that enough was enough and bounced back at the Stadium tonight with a complete victory over Arizona. They rode big nights from AJ Pollock, Mookie Betts, and just-named All-Stars Walker Buehler and Justin Turner (and basically everybody else) to a 22-1 win. Yes, you read that right. Your Los Angeles Dodgers scored twenty-two freakin’ runs!

Max shows why he’s going to Denver

The Dodgers wasted no time in getting to D’backs starter Caleb Smith. Mookie Betts walked to lead off the bottom of the first and immediately advanced to second on a Chris Taylor single. Then, with one out, Max Muncy drove them both home with a solid double to stake the Dodgers to an early 2-0 lead.

Belli and AJ go back-to-back

But the Dodgers hadn’t even begun to mash. One hitter later in the inning, Cody Bellinger absolutely pulverized a Smith fastball and sent it deep into the night for a two-run blast. AJ Pollock must have thought it looked like fun, and he decided to hit a home run of his own a half a dozen pitches later.

These two dingers were notably for two different reasons. With Bellinger, who has been struggling mightily since his return from the IL, it was good to see him gather a little momentum going into the All-Star break. It was definitely an All-Star swing off his bat. With Pollock, it marked his fifth home run already this month, which leads all of MLB. By the time the inning came to an end, it was already 5-0 Dodgers.

Turner celebrates with a grand slam

The next inning was just as fun for the Dodgers’ hitters. Walker Buehler (yes, that Walker Buehler) led off with a solid single to right center. Then, a pair of walk loaded up the bases for Justin Turner. Feeling a little frisky after being named to his second All-Star game, JT decided to show the world that he should have been on the team all along. He worked the count full, and then just sat on a fastball. He put that patented sweet Turner swing on the ball and drilled it to right center. Kaboom! Grand slam, the first of Justin Turner’s career. It was 9-0 Dodgers and the rout was on.

Buehler cruises through six

With a big lead before he’d barely worked up a sweat, Walker Buehler was in vintage form against the Snakes, never really challenged during a low-stress six innings of work. It looked like he had plenty left in the tank, but with the All-Star game coming up on Tuesday he was pulled with his team safely in the lead. Walker’s final line for the night on 95 pitches: 6.0 IP, 3 H, 0 ER 7 K

More like Los Slam-geles, amirite?

As if a 9-0 lead weren’t enough, the Dodgers decided to beat up a bunch more baseballs in the seventh inning. Before the frame was over, they had scored another SEVEN runs, sending nine men to the plate. The big blast in the inning: another grand slam, this one from Mookie Betts. Betts, who announced prior to the game that he would be skipping the All-Star game in favor of recovery from some nagging aches and pains, drilled a pitch from reliever Alex Young into the right center field seats for the fifth grand salami of his still-young career.

And even more home runs!

Just to utterly humiliate the Diamondbacks a little bit more, the Dodgers hit three more home runs before the night was over. Zach McKinstry jacked a two-run job, and Tio Albert hit a solo shot, and in the eighth inning, AJ Pollock hit his second home run on the night. Pollock had a four-hit night, and is red-hot going into the break. Hopefully, we can keep this guy’s motor idling during the time off and he can get right back at it in the second half.

And just for fun, Gavin Lux hit a bases-clearing triple in the bottom of the eighth. Finally, manager Torey Lovullo brought in cheater Josh Reddick to pitch the final two outs of the eighth. He got one out, but then Albert Pujols decided to show Reddick just what he thought of his BS 60-mile-an-hour pitches and he hit his second homer of the night. If you lost track, it was the EIGHTH home run of the game.

The 22 runs that the Dodgers scored on Saturday matches the LA Dodgers record for most runs in a game. If you wondered what happened to the Dodgers offense the last few games, I think we found it. The final game of the home stand will be Sunday afternoon. Tony Gonsolin gets the ball Sunday for a 1:10 start. It’s important that the team keep their foot on the gas and finish up the first half of the year on a positive note. With a 55-35 record, the Dodgers will go into the All-Star game still trailing the Giants in the standings, but with nights like this, you kind of feel like it’s just a matter of time before that is set right as well.